Corrupt A Wish (Game)

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TheMightyPaladin
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Granted, he takes you off

Granted, he takes you off every night before his bath.

I wish to be accepted by all as king of North America

notears
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You're merely a figurehead

You're merely a figurehead that gets all the blame of decisions you never made in the first place and are then executed by the masses

I wish I wasn't a hat anymore

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OK you're a headband

OK you're a headband
I wish I wasn't dead anymore.

Airhead
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The king is dead. Long live

The king is dead. Long live the king!

I wish Friday was not a work day.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

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Airhead wrote:
Airhead wrote:

The king is dead. Long live the king!
I wish Friday was not a work day.

In order to get a 5-day work week in, Sunday is now a work day.

I wish my avatar was as cool as Faceless's.

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notears
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fart gas starts pouring out

fart gas starts pouring out of your avatar

I wish I wasn't headgear anymore

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You are turned back into an

You are turned back into an avatar. The fart gas pouring out of the avatar next to you clogs up your htmls.

I wish I had a secretary.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

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Peewee Herman comes to you

Peewee Herman comes to you from Murphy Brown's secretary pool. Enjoy.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murphy_Brown
Paul Reubens appeared in several episodes as Lansing's sociopathic nephew Andrew J. Lansing, III. He is introduced as one of Murphy's 93 secretaries du jour and, with Carol Kester (Marcia Wallace), was one of only two who measure up to Murphy's standards. Like Carol, Andrew is lured away from Murphy by another job by the end of the episode; in his case, he is promoted to a network executive position through nepotism. He periodically appears in later episodes in that capacity, mostly as his uncle's "black-ops" expert.

I wish that I had Jesse's girl

Criminus
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You have Jesse's girl.

You have Jesse's girl.

Of course, this Jesse is 'Jesse' from team rocket, and her 'girl', is of course 'James', who was always more girly than her.
Yes, you have James..
He wont stop going on about his pokemon.
Eventually, he suckers you into a plan to steal pikachu, which ends with you being you hit by a thunderbolt and sent flying over the horizon.

I wish I had a Golduck with Psychic, Surf, Ice Punch, and Headbutt.

_____________________________________________________________________________

TTheDDoctor
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Criminus wrote:
Criminus wrote:

You have Jesse's girl.
Of course, this Jesse is 'Jesse' from team rocket, and her 'girl', is of course 'James', who was always more girly than her.
Yes, you have James..
He wont stop going on about his pokemon.
Eventually, he suckers you into a plan to steal pikachu, which ends with you being you hit by a thunderbolt and sent flying over the horizon.
I wish I had a Golduck with Psychic, Surf, Ice Punch, and Headbutt.

The Golduck is level 1, and has no PP.

I wish that I had a warehouse to put all my stuff.

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It's a Malta warehouse. Every

It's a Malta warehouse. Every time you leave it resets.

I wish words came easy.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

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All the words in the world

All the words in the world ejaculate in your direction at once.

I wish I hadn't said that

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TheMightyPaladin wrote:
TheMightyPaladin wrote:

All the words in the world ejaculate in your direction at once.
I wish I hadn't said that

You say, "All the words in the world give you a money shot at once," instead.

I wish that I could no longer feel fear.

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TheMightyPaladin
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No longer fearing God you

No longer fearing God you burn for eternity in the fires of hell.

I wish, I wish, with all my heart
To fly with dragons in a land apart.

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TheMightyPaladin wrote:
TheMightyPaladin wrote:

No longer fearing God you burn for eternity in the fires of hell.
I wish, I wish, with all my heart
To fly with dragons in a land apart.

Granted!
However, its in the short story I wrote (on the backstory forum), which means you died, killed by demons.

I wish I had all the powers of the dark side of the force.

_____________________________________________________________________________

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Criminus wrote:
Criminus wrote:

TheMightyPaladin wrote:
No longer fearing God you burn for eternity in the fires of hell.
I wish, I wish, with all my heart
To fly with dragons in a land apart.

Granted!
However, its in the short story I wrote (on the backstory forum), which means you died, killed by demons.
I wish I had all the powers of the dark side of the force.

Luke Skywalker decapitates you for being on the wrong side of the Force.

I wish that I had a million wishes.

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Airhead
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You get a million million

You get a million million-wish wishes. Every one of them entitles you to a million more wishes, and nothing else.

I wish for truth in advertising.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

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You gain truth in advertising

You gain truth in advertising.
The adverts all depict your inner sordid thoughts and past misdeeds.

I wish I can get Luke Skywalker arrested and jailed, since he decapitated me for being a dark jedi, when I had not actually done anything.
The charge, murder and religious intolerance.

_____________________________________________________________________________

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He and many of his friends

He and many of his friends are arrested and charged in a sith court, but it turns out he allowed himself to be captured so he could kill all the sith together at once.
The guard holding him was Lando Calrissian (That master of disguise and infiltration).

I wish the world was flat and balanced on the back of a giant turtle.

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The turtle falls over and you

The turtle falls over and you've killed us all

I wish I knew how to love

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notears wrote:
notears wrote:

The turtle falls over and you've killed us all
I wish I knew how to love

Congratulations! You are now gay.

I wish that I had a pot of gold.

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TheMightyPaladin
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A Very gay Leprechaun tells

A Very gay Leprechaun tells you what you have to do to get it.

I wish Smurfs were real

Airhead
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They're real! In fact, they

They're real! In fact, they look just like you. Brainy Smurf calls you Mighty Smurf.

I wish I could get the Smurf off my shoe.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

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Granted, you kick and it

Granted, you kick and it flies off and splats onto a nearby wall dying instantly... you're a murderer airhead.... a murderer....

I wish this game didn't keep on dying :(

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Granted, the game never dies,

Granted, the game never dies, but you're the only poster left and reply to yourself constantly, going mad over time. See ya!

I wish i had a bottle of never-ending coca-cola.

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As soon as the cap comes off

As soon as the cap comes off literally everything drowns in coca cola

I wish I could go to Disneyland.....

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You go to Disneyland and

You go to Disneyland and spend all day waiting in line in the hot sun.
It's actually everything you wanted, this wish corrupts itself.

I wish for a fairy to grant be wishes that aren't corrupted.

notears
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She only accepts wishes for

She only accepts wishes for cream cheese

I wish I was best pony

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Granted. You transform into a

Granted. You transform into a pony and you are THE BEST PONY... but only in the opinion of one little girl who will soon grow up and no longer like ponies.

I wish for a magical box of pizza that summons a new salami pizza whenever i finish the previous one.

notears
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it summons the pizza directly

it summons the pizza directly into your brain... you die horribly....

I wish for a turkey sandwhich

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Whoosh. Dozens of turkey

Whoosh. Dozens of turkey sandwhiches appear. You're only allowed one, but sandwhich? You starve trying to figure it out.

I wish I had a pet kaiju.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

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It destroys Tokyo

It destroys Tokyo

I wish it was legal for me to be naked in public

TTheDDoctor
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notears wrote:
notears wrote:

It destroys Tokyo
I wish it was legal for me to be naked in public

Granted. Vigilantes operating outside of the law pick up the slack and continue enforcing public decency.

I wish that the Fallout series was real.

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Global nuclear war happens

Global nuclear war happens and you are forced to live the rest of your life as a ghoul slowly losing your sanity

I wish I had a robot butler who had to do everything I said no matter what and who could not kill

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notears wrote:
notears wrote:

Global nuclear war happens and you are forced to live the rest of your life as a ghoul slowly losing your sanity
I wish I had a robot butler who had to do everything I said no matter what and who could not kill

Granted, but your robot butler only has a three-day battery charge that takes seven days to recharge.

I wish I had the power to see the past, present, and future simultaneously.

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Greyhawk wrote:
Greyhawk wrote:

I wish I had the power to see the past, present, and future simultaneously.

Granted, but the information overload degrades your ability to distinguish between the three. Fortunately, this makes it easy to get committed to an insane asylum in the one part of the state that didn't get/isn't being/won't be hit by nuclear bombs and/or fallout...

I wish my digital copies of H.Beam Piper's works were better organized. I have a sudden urge to read "Edge of the Knife"...

Foradain, Mage of Phoenix Rising.
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Vast, intricate metal

Vast, intricate metal structures germinate in tidy lines that extend to the horizon in all directions. On closer inspection they are formed of hollow H-beams, engineering marvels with great resistance to shear forces and bending yet able to transport fluids over great distances. Unfortunately, they are digital. You’re gonna need a 3D printer.

I wish I could 3D print my dreams.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

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Airhead wrote:
Airhead wrote:

I wish I could 3D print my dreams.

Granted! But everything prints out as pineapple flavored bubblegum figures that melt in both sunlight and rain.

I wish I were in Waikiki

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Granted, you are literally in

Granted, you are literally in Waikiki... buried up to your head. And the flood is coming.

I wish there were still dinosaurs around.

When people ask me about my religion, I tell 'em I'd worship Cthulhu.

How bad could I possibly be? Let's see...

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Nos482 wrote: Granted, you
Nos482 wrote:

Granted, you are literally in Waikiki... buried up to your head. And the flood is coming.I wish there were still dinosaurs around.

You immediately get stepped on by a spinosaurus.

I wish Tyranids were real.

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deltaE93
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granted, you are the first to

granted, you are the first to be eaten by invading Tyranids, while the rest of us are either forced into the Imperium or join the Tau in the Greater Good.

I wish that I was so oddly specific in my wish that the next poster had a hard time corrupting it.

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Granted, but the wish you

Granted, but the wish you made was that somebody ate your face, so your face is eaten. you have no face now.

I wish for a cheeseburger sandwich

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notears wrote: Granted, but
notears wrote:

Granted, but the wish you made was that somebody ate your face, so your face is eaten. you have no face now.I wish for a cheeseburger sandwich

You haz ... um ... *had* ... cheezburper .... but I eated it!

I wish that City of Tabbies will have fully-articulated feline character models.

Just a cat from another star!
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Amerikatt wrote: notears
Amerikatt wrote:

notears wrote: Granted, but the wish you made was that somebody ate your face, so your face is eaten. you have no face now.I wish for a cheeseburger sandwichYou haz ... um ... *had* ... cheezburper .... but I eated it!I wish that City of Tabbies will have fully-articulated feline character models.

Granted; the feline character models are cat-girls, not actual cats.

I wish that I was the God of Trolling.

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AAlbusUUmbra wrote: I wish
AAlbusUUmbra wrote:

I wish that I was the God of Trolling.

Granted! You are now the God of Trolling, but your ISP is permanently banned from every game and social network in existence and you are forced to revive an old 80486 system with Netscape so you can troll semi-abandoned Usenet Newsgroups.

I wish I (and I alone, no additional winners) had won the Powerball $500 million dollar jackpot!

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Greyhawk wrote: AAlbusUUmbra
Greyhawk wrote:

AAlbusUUmbra wrote: I wish that I was the God of Trolling.Granted! You are now the God of Trolling, but your ISP is permanently banned from every game and social network in existence and you are forced to revive an old 80486 system with Netscape so you can troll semi-abandoned Usenet Newsgroups.I wish I (and I alone, no additional winners) had won the Powerball $500 million dollar jackpot!

Granted! However, you were paid-off in pennies ... without wrappers or even a bag to put them in! *snicker*

I wish that I had a vat of Catsi's Thermonuclear Chili! *suddenly becomes very hungry*

Just a cat from another star!
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In order to get Catsi's Chili

In order to get Catsi's Chili, you first have to summon Catsi... and you Know how much trouble that will cause!

Also, 'Thermonuclear Chili Eructations'... just sayin'

I wish I could see Amerikatt more often!

Be Well!
Fireheart

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You are reminded of Amerikatt

You are reminded of Amerikatt's sartorial elegance every time a seemingly endless fit of thermonuclear chili eructations renders everything purple for you.

I wish I had skills that would help the City of Titans team.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

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You're skills now include

You're skills now include twerking in such a way that inspires people to work harder but it also gives you friction burns on your beautiful bumbum

I wish it was legal to be naked in public

TTheDDoctor
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notears wrote:
notears wrote:

You're skills now include twerking in such a way that inspires people to work harder but it also gives you friction burns on your beautiful bumbum
I wish it was legal to be naked in public

Only fat and ugly people take advantage of the law, forcing you to seek out eyebleach and psychiatric help until the legalization is repealed.

I wish I never had to worry about becoming fat and ugly.

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Granted, now your just dead

Granted, now your just dead

I wish I had all of the powers of doctor strange

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notears wrote:
notears wrote:

Granted, now your just dead
I wish I had all of the powers of doctor strange

Granted. However, you're now Hugo Strange rather than Stephen Strange. You like to get into peoples' minds, push the edge of scientific knowledge (and decency) ... and you are now on Batman's radar! *shudders*

I wish that Amerikatt's statue is the 2nd tallest one in Phoenix Park (only Ascendant's statue is taller)!

Just a cat from another star!
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The statue is ugly and kind

The statue is ugly and kind of looks like a dog

I wish I could make my farts smell however I want

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You inherit a vast collection

You inherit a vast collection of unlabelled deodorant sprays. It seems like you have every scent imaginable, but trying to find the right one makes you sick.

I wish I had an extra day of my own in every week.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

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Airhead wrote:
Airhead wrote:

You inherit a vast collection of unlabelled deodorant sprays. It seems like you have every scent imaginable, but trying to find the right one makes you sick.
I wish I had an extra day of my own in every week.

You now live out an 8th day of the week every week, during which time is effectively stopped for 24 hours and you can't have a meaningful interaction with anything you can't physically manipulate. Moving through the atmosphere also causes localized compression on the air in front of you wherever you go, and creates a vacuum behind you, which causes a bunch of supercavitation that eventually completely destroys your house. You also age normally during this time, which cuts out a portion of your life expectancy.

I wish I could stop and resume time at will.

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notears
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As soon as you stop time you

As soon as you stop time you can't see anything because light has stopped moving, can't hear anything because sound has stopped and you can't breathe because air has stopped moving

I wish I had a duck for a friend

Airhead
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You find yourself in

You find yourself in possession of a whole roast duck just in time for your friend's birthday. Unfortunately she recognizes her pet duck.

I wish the Earth was flat.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

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The massive warping of the

The massive warping of the earth causes gravity fluctuations, earthquakes and the destruction of the atmosphere, everyone is dead...

I wish that I could breath in space

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Your lungs are now adapted to

Your lungs are now adapted to work in vacuum, successfully extracting the oxygen, disposing of carbon dioxide, without explosive decompression effects... Oh, wait, there's no oxygen in the vacuum to be extracted. I guess you shouldn't have disconnected those bulky O2 tanks...

I wish for the next person's wish to work out better than mine does. ^_^

Foradain, Mage of Phoenix Rising.
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You get stuck in an infinite

You get stuck in an infinite loop of anticip...

I wish for my wish to work out worse than Foradain's.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

notears
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You cause a magical paradox

You cause a magical paradox that causes all of time and space to buckle and bend over and in on itself until we are all but a fine mist floating through the void

I wish I was the fluffiest mammal alive

SisterSilicon
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notears wrote:
notears wrote:

You cause a magical paradox that causes all of time and space to buckle and bend over and in on itself until we are all but a fine mist floating through the void
I wish I was the fluffiest mammal alive

Granted. You are now very small, low on the food chain, and trapped under the couch because the dog thinks you're a squeak toy.

I wish I was a little bit taller.

Twitter: @SisterSilicon

cloganart
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You are now 10 inches taller.

You are now 10 inches taller... but you have no feet anymore!~

I wish I could git gud

Charles Logan
www.cloganart.com

Airhead
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U git gud! But them gits

U git gud! But them gits gudda.

Surely this can't get worse...

I wish I was Justin Bieber.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

Nyxz
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Congrats. You are Justin

Congrats. You are Justin Bieber. Bad news: You are Justin Bieber.

I wish I could play 18 holes on Mars.

SisterSilicon
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Nyxz wrote:
Nyxz wrote:

Congrats. You are Justin Bieber. Bad news: You are Justin Bieber.
I wish I could play 18 holes on Mars.

Granted. The entire planet is one massive sand trap, but the tees are still set back to compensate for the thin air anyway.

I wish I had Coachella tickets.

Twitter: @SisterSilicon

notears
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A giant chest filled with

A giant chest filled with Coachella tickets crashes through your roof causing significant damage to your household

I wish my pet Guinea Pig didn't pee on me anymore...

Airhead
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Your Guinea Pig only pees on

Your Guinea Pig only pees on your friends. They stop visiting.

I wish Lego would make minifigure components to match all of the CoT costume options.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

notears
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You now have a bunch of lego

You now have a bunch of lego cots in all shapes and sizes

I wish this game was out now

Airhead
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This game is tagged trying to

This game is tagged trying to sneak a base. It is out! Go Moguls.

I wish for alphabet soup.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

notears
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Someone throws a bowl of

Someone throws a bowl of alphabet soup at your head

I wish I could beat Asgore in Undertale

Airhead
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You beat on Asgore's

You beat on Asgore's undertail. You are indicted for use of cruel and unusual punishment.

I wish for the power to know exactly where anything is.

"The illusion which exalts us is dearer to us than ten thousand truths." - Pushkin
"One piece of flair is all I need." - Sister Silicon

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Granted. You no longer know

Granted. You no longer know which direction anything is moving.

I wish common sense was more common.

Twitter: @SisterSilicon

notears
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It's more common in spiders

It's more common in spiders and they use it to take over the world

I wish for.... BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!!

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